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Earth: A Provider, Not Depleter

3 Jan

I have a simple message to spread in this new year.  It’s a message that many of us know, but might have forgotten.  It came to me as an abrupt reminder.  And I’m sharing it with you as a still abrupt, but hopefully well-explicated reminder.

“Hey, dude, did you know you come here to get things?”

The messengar.

The messengar.

This is what I saw on January 2nd, in my mind’s eye while I was walking; I swear to you, on the streets of Brooklyn, in the bitter cold, the second day of the new year — through my third eye, clairvoyantly, metaphysically, nearly supernaturally, if you will — a man with a cigarette in his mouth and sunglasses got right in my face and said it.

 

And just in case you missed it the first time:  “Hey, dude, did you know you come here to get things?”

At first I wasn’t sure what he was talking about.  To get things?  That seemed awful materialistic for a spiritual encounter.  To get things.  Okay. I muddled the phrase through in my head and my thoughts traversed to the vexing year that was 2014.  For me, it was a test year, a trying year — a year filled with great struggle, hard work, isolation, loss — and what I interpreted in angry fits railing against my guides, as deprivation.

“You mean I came all the way to Earth for this?”  I often thought last year.  2014 was a year, more than any other year, of deprivation from so much of what I wanted, the prize so far away from me it felt impossible.  Earth was beginning to look like a depleter, not a provider.

YouDeplete

But the messenger had a 2015 greeting that I very much so needed to hear.  “Hey, dude, did you know you come here to get things?” meant that we come to Earth because it truly is a provider, it gives us the tools, opportunities, circumstances and people to achieve our goals.  Sure, we accumulate a lot of “stuff” in a lifetime and Amazon Prime certainly helps with that, but we also accumulate emotional, physical, life-changing experiences that assist us in our journey back to the spiritual realm.  Without Earth facilitating this for us, we would go elsewhere; we are drawn to this place because of what it has to offer — because it equips, it affords, it furnishes growth.

It’s a simple reminder, a reminder we forget when caught up in unmet ambitions — the notion of deprivation as a sign of opportunity’s breadth.

 

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Why We Won’t Trade Our Problems

12 Oct

problems-1All right, do me a favor.  Imagine this.

You’re sitting at a long table surrounded by a crowd of people.  You’ve got folks on your right and folks on your left.  A booming voice calls, “All right, guys, dump ‘em out — one, two, three!”  And all at once, you and your comrades are each expected to dump every single one of your problems out in front of you.  It’s as if you are children on Halloween with a pillowcase full of candy, unpacking all your collected sugary goods.

Moments later, once everyone has done that, the aforementioned booming voice then cries out, “Okay.  Now that it’s all out — trade.”

You stop.  You look at the person next to you.  No one moves.  Everyone around the table stares, reticent to follow the instructions.  Defensively, protectively, a person at the end of the table begins to re-collect all of her problems, stuffing them back to where they came from; the person next to her does the same, and pretty soon everyone follows suit.  Sure, the booming voice is perplexed, but you’re not.  You have no interest giving up your own problems and taking on someone else’s.

problems

But, why is this?  Why are we unwilling to trade our problems?  Why would each of those people around that table clutch onto them defensively as they walked away, protective and possessive?  After all, aren’t problems something we want to give up, say goodbye to, dump onto someone else’s shoulders so we are burden-free?

It’s because we choose our problems, just like we choose the circumstances into the life that we’re born; just like we choose our parents, our struggles, our talents, our obstacles.  A problem can come in the form of a repeated bad habit, a complication with finances, complications with a particular gender, complications with health and chronic conditions — the list is endless.  But each problem is meant to teach us a lesson, is meant to bring great learning and profundity through the superficial hardship and pain.  Iyanla Vanzant often says:  “Growth requires learning from painful experiences by recognizing the role we have played.”  When we imagine giving up our problems, our defensiveness of them arises from a knowing that we will sacrifice growth.  When we envisage flippantly exchanging them with someone else, we immediately sense we are jeopardizing a dire life lesson intended for us specifically in this life, in this incarnation.

When we examine problems through the lens of advancement and expansion, we see that they are actually our friends, they are deeply personal teachers that are with us to serve an essential function to add to our soul’s growth.  We chose them; they are ours.  And when we embrace that, and even more so, imagine parting ways with them at that giant banquet table, we come into a new experience of really owning our problems and the role they play.

That Serious Face

10 Jul

Do you often front your serious face?  Sometimes, I worry it’s the only face I wear.

I carry casual conversation too seriously; I drink a cup of water too seriously; I’m telling you, I’m a Capricorn and any other Capricorn will tell you that when we tell a joke, it’s like we’re delivering it like the Gettysburg Address.  Gravity is in my nature, my DNA.

Although, recently, I’m starting to rethink that.  And going to the Kentucky Derby earlier this year helped that come to the forefront.

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I was all set to surprise my sister, something my family likes to do from time to time.  We secretly buy me a ticket to Louisville, (my hometown) we purposely don’t bring it up anywhere near her, and the minute I touch land they pick me up and we throw her a curveball by showing up to where she is.  I was supposed to arrive on a Wednesday evening, but 30 minutes before we were all set to board, our flight was completely cancelled.  I was rebooked for the next morning, set to depart at the humane time of 6:00 AM, and spent most the evening and accompanying early morning hours fuming at the nearly $125 of wasted cab fare I had to spend to get back and forth from the airport so many times.

I board my flight to Kentucky, what is normally a smallish plane that is typically half-full, and am shocked to see it jam-packed full of people, everyone in bright pastels, the women in large, obtrusive traditional Derby hats, all anxiously awaiting their arrival so they can run to the horse tracks.  I sit wedged next to two hefty women, and as we wait impatiently, we are informed our flight is delayed at least another hour.  We all cry out exclamations, I am completely stewing in a web of fury, my blood pressure rises to a point I don’t think I can take it anymore when I suddenly look down at my shirt, a bright pink button-down, which I was instructed to wear to the festivities given my propensity to sport my usual New York black and grays — and I chuckle.

Me, a Capricorn, suffering from sleep deprivation and abuse from the airline — delayed, and chuckling.

What I Practically Looked Like Dressed for Derby.

What I Practically Looked Like Dressed for Derby.

Why am I taking this so seriously? I kept wondering  Why are we all taking this so seriously?  We are rushing to a small town in the middle of the country, sporting big hats and bright shirts, to watch a bunch of horses run around in a circle.  Hell, I practically looked like a cupcake and the women next to me looked like cheap drag queens.  And truly, since that moment, that moment of sitting in my own tempestuousness in my bright pink shirt, I have taken notice of every situation I’m in where I take it very seriously.  And yes, the list is long.

I don’t think this planet is designed for people who take it too seriously; I’m not sure that’s the key to abundance or happiness or even success.  Sure, when we approach situations from a solemn and grave place, we think we are getting ahead, that we are actually beating the system somehow and deserve what we’re trying to achieve more, that this is somehow a tactic that will get us farther along.  But, I’m of the impression that people who are more laid back and carefree actually wind up getting more and becoming less disappointed from this world in the end.  If “all life is a test and only a test, if it were more than a test we would have been given more instructions about what to do and where to go” — as the expression goes — then why take approach it with such sobriety?

Choosing not to take experiences too seriously can wind up cultivating a more authentic experience with it in the end.  Choosing not to take people too seriously can allow you to accept them for who they are.

I was telling a good friend of mine about this very delayed entry I had planned on writing several weeks ago, and she said she thought the topic was relevant as the other morning, she, too, found herself in a flurry of schedules and phone calls and culminating stress.  Her boss, an affable young man who heard her sighing and fretting at her desk, approached her and asked, point blank, “What’s the matter?” And she proceeded to tell him her endless agenda — commitments, activities, obligations, it ran the gamut.  Her boss looked at her, cracked a smile, and earnestly said: “You realize that none of this matters, don’t you?”  And she was dumbstruck, left alone at her desk, her never-ending list of responsibilities having now lost their luster.

Maybe other planets and dimensions are meant to be taken more seriously than this one, I don’t know.  But, the more I look at that famous statue of Buddha, the more I understand why he’s laughing — because down here, you kinda have to.

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Commitment Not Compatible With Hovering

27 Apr

hovering

I recently had the life-changing opportunity of going to a castle in Scotland for a month to abscond from the outside world to focus solely on my writing. Upon arriving to this aforementioned castle, I spent careful and conscientious time focused on what projects I was committed to working on while I was there. If I wasn’t committed to the project, I wasn’t going to work on it, I said to myself. My time was too valuable and the opportunity was too immense. And upon searching through the copious projects I brought with me, ranging from screenplays to musicals to collections of short fiction, the one that really stuck out as something I was deeply devoted to working on was a book – my first novel, in fact.

NOTE: If you’re not really committed to something, don’t really commit to it.  (Now you can keep reading.)

In the past, amongst the hustle and bustle of everyday New York City life, I’ve pretended not to care about some of my writing. It was a defense mechanism to cover up my true feelings for my work so I could justify ignoring it, devaluing it, passing it off as something not to lose sleep over. The opposite was true of my first few weeks at this castle in Europe; with my commitment known, I would go to sleep staring at the manuscript on my desk, anxiously worrying about the “genius” that would have to be infused into it the following day, terrified that I might not really have the chops to do it.

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The Intimidating Presence

Sometimes, after reaching my daily limit of writing, I would return to my room after dinner and flip through the pages, reading random sentences I reworked from earlier, skimming over paragraphs, making useless notes in the margins that I knew would do me no good upon revisiting the pages in the morning. I was hovering. I felt like an overprotective parent who wouldn’t let his child out of his sight, a scrutinizing prison guard not letting the inmate vanish from his gaze. Night and day, in between moments of freneticism and repose, I hovered.

A week into my fellowship there, I realized, while laying in bed one night looking at the moon with a glass of wine in hand, this obsessiveness wasn’t working for me, that not letting this manuscript out of my sight and feeling the need to be connected to it all day was interrupting my flow. Upon sorting through this in my mind, as I looked out my window in the Scottish night, a voice said to me:

Where there is commitment, there is no need to hover.

I sat up in bed, and an extraordinary light bulb that went off in my mind. Of course there’s no need to hover. I am committed to this book. I made my commitment known a while ago for this book. And it’s true, where there is commitment, there is absolutely no need to hover. I got up (after putting my wine down, of course), grabbed a folder and shoved the manuscript in it, closed it, bound it with a rubber band and put it on my bookshelf. The manuscript was out of sight, no longer an intimidating presence; I would not be tempted to hover over it any longer. My commitment to this will bring about a devotion and completion of this, I thought to myself. Immediately, I felt at peace.

Most of my life lessons come in the form of writing lessons first, so thinking through this concise and lucid bit of wisdom that came to me that night, I realized how applicable it can be to interpersonal relationships. When we make a commitment known to a friend, a significant other, even a colleague – a commitment to them and the relationship, there is no need to hold onto it for dear life, to grip it by the neck in total rigidity.

Through true commitment, there is ease; through true commitment, there is an effortlessness and security to what (and who) we are committed to. Take stock of your commitments, choose them wisely, and know that they will never belong in the same room as hovering, that they are about as separate as oil and vinegar.

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Yelling At Winter

7 Feb

We have the power to alter our lives in whatever direction we choose.  I really believe that.  I’ve seen it work firsthand for me with a large vision board that hangs prominently on my wall.  Image by image, word by word, I am witnessing these desires slowly manifest and it’s proof to me that most undoubtedly, we have the free will to shape our destiny.  

Except, of course, when we can’t.

As human beings, we are still subject to time.  And the act of receiving something — a partner, a new job, that writing gig you’ve been dreaming of for years — can take years to find its way to you.  Not because the Universe is slow; but, manifestation functions through Divine timing, not the minute-by-minute measurement tool we use on Earth.  The expression “seasons of life” ring true; at some times, we are meant to be doing one thing; others, we’re meant to be doing something else.  I have had a difficult time learning this lesson.  It seems I am in a truly bizarre season of my life.

Realistically, my day-to-day involves great isolation.  I work alone, I write alone, I run errands alone, there are days where I don’t talk to anyone, there are times when a text message conversation is my only interaction of the day.  Now, before you start judging, I have to qualify this here — I asked for this.  I told Spirit years ago that I wanted to work from home, to have a life completely dedicated to my writing.  I wanted total immersion, I wanted a sharp focus, I wanted no distractions.  And I got it.  Boy oh boy, did I get it, and while I’m reaping the benefits, I’m also coping with the disadvantages.  I’m lonely.

One day, in particular several months ago, I remember being totally livid.  I couldn’t believe that at this time in my life I was having such little fun.  “All I do is work,” I kep thinking.  “This is sad, this is pathetic.”  I sat in my kitchen, I put my head in my hands and I said, “Spirit, explain to me what’s happening right now.  I don’t understand.”

I waited. I took a breath. And then, very clearly, Spirit simply told me: “You’re yelling for summer to be here in the middle of winter.”

Me Yelling at Winter.

Me Yelling at Winter.

I stopped. I looked out my window. The snow was stacking on top of itself on the sidewalks outside; I imagined myself out there in the streets, slipping on the icy sidewalks, yelling and screaming at the on pouring of flakes coming at us for spring to just get here already. I realized how insane I would look if I did this, if I were to stand outside and yell at winter … because it’s winter.  And I understood, with great alacrity, what Spirit was trying to show me.

With the knowledge we can shape our destiny, we must also remember to accept the season of our life.

While free will will always hold true, it’s equally important to know there are times in our lives where we must simply experience the experience.  My experience of isolation in order to immerse myself in my work is the season in which I find myself; it cannot be changed, it cannot be redone, it’s clear to me I must experience this and I must see it through. 

Paraphrasing Iyanla Vanzant, she urges people to “enjoy the exits and detours of each byway and highway of life.”  Yes, this is easier to do when that stretch of highway is a fun one.  But what about when it isn’t?  During trying times, I urge you to remind yourself, as I have, that this phase of life, this small fraction of my time here in this body, this bizarre extended season I can’t seem to get out of, is one small part of a greater journey of my experience.  This season of my life does not define me, yet I must experience it.  This season of my life is one stop, among many, down the highway I’m meant to go down.

Accept the season, enjoy the snow.  When you move onto summer, there are no doubt things you will miss when it was cold.

 

The Psychic Teachers Explain it All

2 Nov

Download past podcasts from iTunes!

Download “Psychic Teachers”  podcasts from iTunes!

Deb Bowen and Samantha Fey have made quite a name for themselves in the metaphysical community with their successful (and consistent!) weekly podcast “Psychic Teachers.”  With great insight, wit and compassion, each week Deb and Samantha give their thoughts on all things related to this world and the next and have proved themselves to be great teachers to people all around the globe — many of whom have never met them, but feel a great kinship and gratitude for them regarding this service they provide.

I loved interviewing them individually on Open Doorways earlier this year, but had even more fun asking both these ladies about an assortment of topics together, ranging from the freakiness of 3:00 AM to whether or not our guides watch us having sex.  (Hey, we all have wondered.)  Deb and Samantha also discuss their new spiritual counseling service that they’ve just launched, which I’m sure will assist those interested in further spiritual development by leaps and bounds.

Whether you’re just meeting these two for the first time or you’re a devoted listener, they never fail in providing and enlightening and guiding people to a better understanding of not only our higher selves, but the realm beyond we are constantly wanting to know more about.

Why is 3:00 in the morning a strange time spiritually?  What’s going on at that time and why is it best to stay away?  (Reminds me of being at a bar that late — nothing good can happen; if people are looking to go home with someone, they usually compromise and choose whomever, often times making a big mistake!) 

DEB: The 3 o’clock legend has to do with the time of Jesus’ crucifixion. Legend is that 3 am was the time he was captured in the Garden of Gethsemane and 3 pm the next day is when He died.  It also has to do with what is called “graveyard time,” which is when graveyards are said to be the most active.  I disagree with this – graveyards are some of the least haunted places – who wants to hang around their dead body?  Only those who are recently dead and not transitioned to the other side are there, and are often seen as orbs.  As soon as they realize they are dead and really across the veil, they leave the graveyard.

3am

SAMANTHA:  There’s also the belief that the time between 3 am and dawn the veil is thinnest.  I’ve read something about the electromagnetic energy making it easier at this time for spirits to connect with us.  However, I think it’s also because it’s the time of the night when we are truly settled in and quiet.  Most of us are always on the run and going, going, going.  Even at midnight, we’re checking emails, writing to do lists for the next day.  But by the time 3 am rolls around, we’re finally sleeping.  Our energy is calm, peaceful and open to paranormal activity.

 Why is the moment of waking up in the morning greeted by such clarity?  I know there have been moments when I have shot out of bed with information that I needed to know or an answer to a question I had had; also, the two times I have seen a three-dimensional spirit in front of me was just at the moment of waking up.  Can you speak to this?  Is this a time to really listen to those messages? 

DEB: That transition moment between sleep and wakefulness is when our conscious self still has contact with our subconscious,  This is when our psyche moves easily between the two.  As we are awakening, it is easier for our psyche and for spirits to reach our conscious mind.  I have heard someone call my name several times when I was in this state. Sometimes we see loved ones, or sparkling lights which are our guides and angels.

 SAMANTHA: I believe that every night when we go to sleep, we visit the other side.  We meet with our guides, our team, and go over how we’re doing on our path.  Some of this we’re supposed to remember but most of it gets stored in our subconscious to be recognized and used when needed.  The moment of waking up is when we’re closest to the between worlds and that’s why we tend to have clarity at that time.

Deb, why don’t you like voodoo?  

voo doo

DEB: Very, very scary to me!!!  I had a past life as a voodoo priestess, in which I misused power and was harmful to others.  I believe I have made restitution for this in subsequent lives, but I am very, very careful in this one to be kind and truthful to my clients.  While I certainly respect others’ use of voodoo, I’m freaked out by the tools used in voodoo.  I was talked into going to the Voodoo museum in New Orleans several years ago, and got physically sick as a result of being in that energy.

Samantha, you had a rough year health-wise and also emotionally from some of the stuff you had to go through.  You’ve talked openly about how depression affected your ability to give readings.  Can you tell us about that and how you got out of it?  What do you think Spirit was trying to teach you by decreasing your ability to give readings during that time? 

 SAMANTHA: I wasn’t depressed as much as I was exhausted by the enormity of handling the word “cancer” and what it meant for me. I think I had to go through the diagnosis of breast cancer so I would learn to set better boundaries.  I never learned how to say no without feeling a lot of guilt.  Going through all of this taught me that I have to look out for myself, take care of myself and love myself in order to love others.  Before, I thought it was selfish to put my needs first.  Now I know it’s imperative to practice self-care so that I can be selfless and loving and nurturing to those in my life.  There was a period of about three months where I couldn’t read at all.  Nothing was coming through.  I had to cancel all my appointments.  It was a very frightening time.  But I know my guides were going to extreme measures to get me to rest and slow down.  After my mastectomy, for example, I only took off four days of work.  That’s ridiculous!  I see that now, but then having cancer was just something to add to my to do list. I’d been getting the message to slow down for years and I kept ignoring it.  Part of it was ego – people need me.  Part of it was fear – I need to make a living.  And part of it was how I coped – just keep swimming.  To slow down, to stop, to just be – those were foreign concepts to me.  Now I’ve learned to listen to those inner urgings that tell me to rest, to take a day off, to do something fun, to play.  Before, I saw reading or knitting or having lunch with a friend as a luxury, a treat.  Now I see it for what it is – a necessity. 

We have to take time to recharge our batteries, especially us empaths.  We take on too much from other people, we feel too much.  Therefore it’s necessary to slow down from time to time, go within and refuel so to speak.

Have either of you been so moved during a reading that you started to cry?  If so, while still protecting your session and client, can you tell us about it? 

DEB: Our clients often come to us because they want closure regarding really painful circumstances in their lives.  For example, I recently worked with a client who has a terminal illness and was molested as a child, was estranged from her mother, and had many other issues.  Her story broke my heart.  I did get tearful as I listened to her.  However, our clients need us to be strong and consistent, so I wiped my tears and gave her the strength, support and information she needed from me.  There is always hope, and I work with my Guides to find that ray of hope that gives clients the courage and stamina to face the adversities in their lives.

 SAMANTHA: Sometimes, when a spirit gets too close to me in a reading, they will “press” their emotions onto my aura.  That’s the only way to describe it.  They want to show their family how much they love them and miss them.  However, it’s very important for me to remain separate emotionally from the client or else I can’t read the energy as clearly.  But there are many times when I hang up the phone and just cry and cry.  I had a very distinguished scientist visit me for a reading.  He was obviously uncomfortable visiting a medium, and made it clear he wasn’t sure he believed in this.  But when I brought through his son with specific validations as to the color of flowers at the funeral, the site of the memorial and the necklace his wife wore in memory, he broke down sobbing.  I still think of that father often and send him prayers of healing. I’ve read for many grieving parents, but something about that father’s reluctance to believe and then the letting down of all his walls through his tears will stay with me forever.

Deb, I faintly remember you talking on the air about an experience you had with table-rising/psychokinesis.  Can you share that experience? 

psychokinesis

DEB: Many years ago my friend Jean the Palm Reader and another friend lifted, with two fingers each, a heavy wooden coffee table with a brass brazier in the center.  This works because of basic physics – nothing psychic about it.  Everything is energy.  Period.  When we connect with the energy of something, weight and space don’t matter.  What matters is that we align our vibrational rate to the vibrational rate of the object, and it moves easily.  The Russians did lots of experiments with this in the 1960s.  

Samantha, I feel like in many ways you have a specialty tuning into romantic relationships.  Why is this, do you think?  And can you elaborate on what exactly you see and feel when you’re tuning in psychically to a relationship or future relationship?  Do you see actual romantic interactions?  Do you see your client and his/her partner intimately?  Describe your process in as much detail as you can in how it applies to romantic relationships. 

SAMANTHA: I love to tune into love.  It’s what makes the world go around after all!  I believe that deep down we are all searching for love but what we really need and something I’m passionate about is helping people learn to love themselves.  We will attract people into our lives that reflect how we feel about ourselves.  If we’re constantly beating ourselves up and putting ourselves down, we’ll attract an abusive person.  If we believe we’re unworthy of love, we won’t attract anyone.  If we believe only in the falling in love part, if we’re intoxicated with that first rush of love, we’ll move from relationship to relationship.  If you need to determine who you THINK you are all you have to do is look at the loves you’ve invited into your life.  They are mirrors of your inner self. 

I work primarily through symbols. A cake means a birthday is coming up.  Flowers means someone’s recently transitioned to the other side. When I’m doing a reading, sometimes I’ll see two glasses toasting each other, and I’ll know the client is about to meet someone or some celebration connected to a current relationship is coming up.  Sometimes I’ll see a baby which for me can either mean an actual baby is coming to my client or she/he’s about to give birth to a new relationship.  I always joke that my readings are like playing charades.  The client’s guides show me pictures and then I have to interpret those pictures.  Sometimes I get it wrong, but I always share what I’m seeing with my client so they can add their own interpretation to the symbols.

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Sometimes I’ll see an actual meeting place for two people – a bar, a restaurant by the ocean, an office building which means they’ll soon start dating a co-worker.  Whenever I see two people awkwardly shaking hands at a restaurant, that’s my symbol for two people who will meet through a set up – either a blind date set up by friends or through on-line dating.

I’ll get a vague impression of what the person looks like.  I’ll see a hair color or height for example.  But I’m hesitant to share this with my client because I could be wrong.  I trust the feelings I get about a future person more so than the physical description.  I always ask to see a calendar so I can give my client a timeline.  I imagine the calendar flipping through the months and ask it to stop at the meeting month.

It’s important to note, however, that future predictions are tricky even with the best psychics because my client can choose not to invite that new person into their life either because they aren’t ready or, more likely, because they’re afraid of opening their heart. Or the person they’re supposed to meet has the free will to change too.  And, of course, there’s always me.  I could get it wrong, interpret the picture incorrectly or just be having an off day.  So I always caution clients to take the information with a grain of salt.  The important thing to take from a reading is this: you are not alone.  You have so much help on the other side.  You can create your future at any moment through prayer and focused intent.  Ask for help from your guides, angels and family members in heaven and you will receive it.  They want to help but because of the law of free will you have to ask first.

Fact or fiction: Alcohol (as in a drink or two, not ten)  can help give a clearer reading. 

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DEB: Nada.  Nope.  Not at all.  Even as I write this, I can see my Guide shaking his head.  I believe I need to be as clear as possible when I read for someone.  Alcohol would muddy my brain and interferes with my connection to Spirit when I do readings.

SAMANTHA: I think drinking lowers inhibitions so it can be easier to read because you’re walls are down.  But so is your protection.  Whenever we read someone while drinking, we’re opening ourselves up to negative “stuff” and that’s never worth it. 

Fact or fiction: Our guides watch us have sex. 

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DEB: Nope again.  Trust me, they are not voyeurs.  They do, however, want us to have what is for our highest good, so they want our sexual relationships to be positive ones.  It would be good to ask your Guide about a person before you enter into a sexual relationship!

SAMANTHA: No! They would never do that.  A ghost would, but a spirit guide would never.

Fact or fiction: You both share the same guide.  

DEB: Fiction.  Our guides are very similar – when we have shared photos of our vision of our guides with each other, our guides are almost identical, and communicate with us in very similar ways.  When we began working together, we were fascinated by this and asked ourselves this same question.  Who knows?  They may be brothers!

Tell us about your new services with spiritual counseling.  How does that work with the two of you over the phone?  

DEB: Our Spiritual Coaching Service is so wonderful!!  Our clients love the work we’re doing together.  Many folks need a coach (in our case, two of them!) to guide them through a spiritual labyrinth of paths they could take, and help them choose the one(s) that truly resonate with their soul’s purpose.  We work with our clients to clarify what they really want to accomplish, and work with them on ways they can make those accomplishments happen.  We’re working with clients who want to develop their intuition, learn to meditate, work with crystals, understand numerology and hone other skills.  We also help people to define their passions, determine what they really want out of life and help them to manifest it.  We’re focused on leading people to their true selves.  Each week, we give homework that is tailor made to individual needs. Our fee for this service is $250 per month.  We speak with our clients twice a month for about 45 minutes in each call, and we email encouraging information and homework assignments each week.

 SAMANTHA:  Thank you Drew for the opportunity to speak with you again.  We admire the work you do and are honored to be a part of your path.

 

Deb Bowen & Samantha Fey

Deb Bowen & Samantha Fey

You can find out more about The Psychic Teachers by clicking here or downloading previous podcasts from iTunes.  Samantha Fey can be contacted separately here and Deb Bowen here; they both provide readings separately and together, as well as numerous other services.  

 

Breakups = Nonevent Shakeups

20 Oct

We have two and a half more months till we say goodbye to the 6 Universal Year, according to Numerology.  And with each year, it has its own characteristics.  But what I think intrigues me most about the 6 Universal Year is that it’s often associated with bringing about breakups.  You could say it’s “the breakup year.”   And honestly, I have seen my fair share of breakups the last nine months.  From January on, I’ve seen countless romantic couples calling it quits week after week; I’ve talked to many people who have had to end close friendships.  I know that I had to “break up” with a job back in April that was no longer serving me, in addition to an agent I was working with up until recently.  It’s been a year of ending relationships on all fronts that no longer serve us or that were initially built on rocky foundations.  And like anyone knows, along with a breakup, comes drama.

Unless, of course, if it’s a nonevent.  And according to life coach Schuyler Manhattan, it is.

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I’m sitting in a coffee shop with Schuyler months ago and he casually mentions this in between sentences, as if it’s not completely contradictory, mind-blowing information.  “A breakup is a nonevent,” he tells me.  I’m mid-sip.  I stop.  I stare.  I’m completely struck with what I’m hearing.  This can’t be correct.  Breakups are definite marks on your timeline of life.  Hell, breakups can stop time in and of themselves.  While I’m not exactly sure what a “nonevent” is, I’m pretty positive a breakup IS an event.  It’s a pretty huge event.  “Wait, wait, wait — what?”  I stop him and he explains.

“If you believe that everything that happens to you in the world is for your highest good, then bad events don’t happen ‘to’ you, rather it’s the Divine’s way of working ‘through’ to you,” Schuyler tells me.  “Our life experience alone causes the requests that we are emitting emotionally and through our thoughts, which are vibrations we emanate. The Universe responds through the crack of least resistance.”

The Universe responds through the crack of least resistance.

“Okay, well, that could be true when you’re the one that initiates the breakup,” I tell him.  “But what about when you’re the one being broken up with?  That’s an event.  That’s a calamity.  That’s what sends people to the Self-Help section at bookstores and go off the deep end altogether.” When I say this, I immediately think of a wedding I went to recently where a young woman at my table somewhat drunkenly told me a 20-minute story of how she was completely blindsided by a recent breakup with a younger guy she was dating.  Her pain and confusion was palpable.  I explain her situation to Schuyler as an example.  “What about people like her?” I ask him.

Unknown“Sometimes this crack of least resistance shows up in what at first seems like an unfortunate circumstance (e.g., a breakup), but is really the necessary step to manifest the accumulative desire (your new, evolved soulmate). And so, whilst you might not have had the awareness to call off a relationship that wasn’t truly a match to you on the deepest level, sometimes our divine team works *through* others (e.g., our lover) to take the necessary actions for our best interest that we were unlikely to take.”

My mind is blown.  I look out the window.  A nonevent — who knew?

Schuyler’s wisdom has stayed with me since that conversation, but so have two other realizations I’ve come to about breakups this year.  I couldn’t help but think about the first and only time I’ve ever been fired from a job.  I was living in LA just after undergrad and working at a very dysfunctional music management company in Hollywood.  I was miserable; people yelled at me all day.  I dreaded waking up, I dreaded going to work.  After four months in, I began to plan my exit strategy.  When I returned to LA after the holidays, I would put in my two weeks.

Turns out, I never had to, as I was let go just before I left.  “It’s just not working out for us, and we know it’s not working out for you,” they told me.  I left with a severance check and drove home in shock.  How insane of me to think that everything was fine on their end and it was chaos on mine.  Doesn’t the same apply to romantic relationships, too?  Even though my friend at that wedding was blindsided, in a way, if she was really honest with herself, wasn’t the relationship also not working for her, too?

Breakups set you free from parasitic and commensalistic relationships.

My second and last observation about breakups is best explained through a conversation I had not too long ago with a good friend who lives on the West Coast, who, for the past decade has had an on again, off again tumultuous relationship with her boyfriend.  They’ve broken up several times over the course of ten years; they argue all the time, they complain about each other to friends behind their back.  Earlier this year, they had a very public and vitriolic temporary breakup that was about as dramatic as they get.  Dreading to know the answer, I ask her how things around going and she tells me, “I’m really lonely.  I don’t really laugh anymore.  I can’t be myself around him and I don’t know what to do.”  Um, hello — words like this usually only lead to one logical conclusion, right?  I take a breath and I muster from somewhere deep inside me, advice I’ve never given anyone before.

“Maybe you’ve just been waiting for a peaceful way to end this relationship.  Maybe the lesson here is about your exit; you both have tried time and time again to leave one another, usually amongst a lot of drama, and it’s always resulted in getting back together, yet that then is shortly followed by unhappiness.  You’re just going in this cycle.  Maybe this relationship needs to end in a quiet, peaceful way; maybe what you both need is a soft and gentle passing of you two as a couple, nothing loud, nothing crazy, in order to finally put this relationship to rest.”

Breakups, I believe, are best served as gentle passings.  And while some may be more dramatic than others, I do think it helps to view them, ultimately, as Schuyler notes, as nonevents.  It’s as if what we’re being asked to do is take a turn on a highway we didn’t anticipate, and while it may be jarring and not the route we had initially planned, it’s really a better way to get to that eventual destination.

 

West Texas Highway

October As a Crystal Ball — Interview with Numerologist Alison Baughman

6 Oct

After listening to Alison Baughman on Joseph Tittel’s JOURNEY INTO THE PARANORMAL podcast, I was struck with her insightful information regarding the month of October and its predictive aspects for the year to come.  Evidently, October can, in fact, be a month where repeated incidents, themes and people could forecast their presence in 2014.  

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Alison has been featured on Open Doorways before taking about the power of the 6 year which you can read about here, but below she discusses October’s unique and special ability to, in fact, be that crystal ball that reveals what is to come in the next year.  Think this month is all about pumpkin beer and Halloween?  Think again.  

First off, talk to us about October. Numerologically, what’s it symbolize since it’s the 10th month of the year

First, let me clarify the numeric influences of October. There are multiple factors to consider.

October is a 10 Month which corresponds to the meaning of the number 1. The 1 is symbolic for new beginnings, new opportunities and taking action. It would be good advice for everyone to, at least, give careful refection to what they want to create in their future.  It is important to point out that when we look at the Numerology of October, we also have to consider it is a 7 Universal Month. The Universal Month energy is the overall influence to everyone on the planet. We arrive at a 7 Universal Month by adding the Universal Year Number (2+0+1+3= 6)  to the Universal Month Number  ( 1+0=1) .

The 7 is strong spiritual vibration. It asks us to go within and do a little soul searching. It also seeks to find the truth by looking beneath the surface. I would imagine that perhaps we may find some secrets uncovered in the month of October, in ourselves and in the news. The 7 is also strongly associated with water and, with that being said, the weather may bring strong storms, hurricanes or potential flooding.

Each person also has their own Personal Month Number based upon their date of birth which directly influences them specifically.  Information about your Personal Month Number and meaning can be found on my website http://www.VisibleByNumbers.com .

When looking at the energy of October, you need to consider all 3 aspects.

 

You have said there is a “crystal ball”-like element to October; that is has in store for us a preview of what’s to come in the next year. Can you explain that to us?

I always encourage my clients to journal the events in their life during the month of October. What most people do not realize is that whatever you experience in October is a reflection of what you can expect to experience in the upcoming year because your Personal Month Number for October matches your Personal Year Number for 2014. You can look at it as a little “taste” of things to come.  It gives you a preview of events.

To give you an example, my dog had an accident and she broke her leg in August one year. By all intents and purposes, after 6 weeks, she should have been fully recovered. She did not heal properly and late in September, we discovered she re-broke her leg. In October that year, she was still wearing a cast. I could not imagine this going on into next year but she ended up having to have surgery on her leg and a plate put in and I was still running her back and forth to the vet in January and February the following year. Thankfully she recovered but October did give me a “heads up” on what was to come.

So, does this apply to people? If we see a lot of one person in October, does it necessarily mean that person will have a big influence on our lives/presence in 2014?

There are a few things I suggest you do. Make sure you spend time with your favorite people in October to assure that they are an important part of your life in the upcoming year. Arrange a dinner party, make plans to get together or you might just want to pick up the phone and touch bases with them.  If you happen to meet someone new in October, you can safely assume that person will be in your life next year, whether it is business or pleasure.

 

Can you dig a little deeper here and define “presence”? What are we looking for here in October – patterns, repetition, signs? How do we know what to pay attention to that is presenting itself as a preview?

Some events will simply spontaneously happen but there are some things you can take the initiative on.  For example, letting go of unhealthy habits in October will ensure that you continue that effort in 2014.  Also, keep an eye on your finances in October. If you have more money coming in this month, the good news is that things look good financially next year. If not, take the initiative to review your finances and get them in order.

Pay attention to your health. If you get a cold in October, you may want to start taking Vitamin C and D to boost your immune system and focus on getting your rest and eating right to ward off any health problems in 2014. If you are feeling robust and energetic or find that your health is improving, you can expect more of that in 2014.

For those of you that are having difficulties with a relationship, make some compromises or work it out so you do not bring that energy into the following year. If your relationships are solid, you are in good shape in that department for next year.

Make sure you fill October with experiences you want more of! For example, if you dream of traveling, plan a mini excursion in October.

Most importantly, keep a positive attitude and pay attention to your thoughts. Do joyful things that make you happy. Bring that happiness into 2014.

What if we have a really rough October? Let’s say finances are bad and we have a constant steam of bad luck. Should we be worried about 2014?

If you experience difficulties in October in any of those categories, then you can expect more of that in 2014. The important thing here to remember is that you are getting advanced notice and you can prepare accordingly. Take some steps now to lessen the effects in 2014.

It is life. We all have our ups and downs and some years are better than others. Numerology helps us to understand the ebb and flow of the energy in our lives. No person can look back on their life and not be able to identify with struggles of some kind. This is how our soul evolves. There is nothing to be fearful about because your soul planned this journey and you are fully equipped to handle all your experiences, the good and the bad.

Does Halloween have any relationship to numerology? I have to ask, since we talk about spirits on this site and it’s coming up.

I think this Halloween should be very interesting 10/31/2013 is an 11 Universal Day and the 11 is symbolic of an open doorway to the spiritual realm.

The 3 in the 31 Day of Halloween is associated with psychic mediums and prophetic and vivid dreams.

The 4 day of Halloween (3+1=4) is interesting because the number 4 is considered to be an unlucky number in Chinese and Japanese because it sounds like the word “death”. 

All in all, it makes for an interesting combination.

 

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Alison Baughman is a world-renowned numerologist.  You can learn more about her at www.visiblebynumbers.com.

Cravings Seen Clairvoyantly

27 Sep

Luckily, this is not the first time Ellen Tadd has been featured on Open Doorways.  A successful author, speaker, lecturer and counselor, her amazing clairvoyant abilities have helped thousands of people around the world.  Not only is she a past life therapist and can see a client’s multiple lives, but she also has a unique ability to tune into a person’s cravings to look for the greater, spiritual significance behind them.  Think wanting potato chips five times a day doesn’t mean anything deeper?  Well, think again.

Ellen discusses her work with cravings, and how she sees them clairvoyantly.

 

food-craving

On a spiritual level, when we crave something, be it food or otherwise, what is happening? Define craving as you see it through your work as a clairvoyant (how you see them clairvoyantly) and if it’s technically different from an addiction. 

Through my clairvoyant observation of the chakra system, I have found that all craves and addictions come from a unhealthy solar plexus chakra, or in other words they have an emotional underpinning.  A crave is a desire that comes from imbalance or a lack of feeling whole. An addiction is such a powerful crave that even in the midst of causing great harm the negative habits continue.

 Salt and sugar are the two main food cravings, but as I understand it they are different in nature. What does craving salt and sugar mean?

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I learned many years ago to energetically pull craves and addictions out of people’s solar plexus chakras. As I pull this blockages I have visions of what the underlying emotional issues are and through the years I have observed patterns. Craving salt commonly stems from a pattern of feeling overly responsible, while sugar tends to be linked to wanting more love.

Obesity is so pervasive now in the US; some could say it’s related to cravings for junk food. Can you speak to this in light if your research/work on cravings and the macro picture/dilemma of the rise of obesity?

Recently over the phone I pulled fast food craves of an old friend of mine. It was fascinating to see that the root issue was an unconscious memory of her happy feelings with her father at fast food restaurants when she was a girl. Her father died when she was quite young and when she ate junk food at these restaurants she felt the longing to be close to her father satisfied for a while. All of these feelings where unconscious and yet when I pulled the energetic root out of her solar plexus her junk food craves went away.

People with craves have unresolved emotional issues that are the root cause of the problem. There are some similar patterns to be seen in everyone and some unique stories.

Pregnant women often crave strange foods.  What does this represent?

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It is important to recognize the difference between a desire and a crave. When we feel whole, balanced, a sense of inner well being we will all have desires. A crave on the other comes from an imbalance. Sometimes a pregnant woman craves a food, because of an imbalance nutritionally or the crave could come from an emotional issue. A feeling of a crave has a longing, while a desire just is without the tension.

Alcoholism is so prevalent and such a part of the zeitgeist; much has been written on it and it’s something we are all so aware of.  Spiritually speaking, what is the craving for alcohol really about?  Sure, depression is the first thing that comes to mind, but more specifically how do you see alcoholism clairvoyantly? 

We are a solar plexus dominant culture. Living this way makes it hard to stay objective and not get overly affected by others and our cultural confusion. I find the repeated pattern with alcoholism is one of feeling overwhelmed, experiencing too much emotion and wanting a break. The alcohol creates a numbing effect, which lessens the experience of being inundated, whether the overwhelm comes from feeling unsupported, feeling inadequate to handle the complexity of life, or being a sponge to other people’s issues.

In your opinion, when we go to the cupboard to get that bag of potato chips or to the freezer to get that pint of ice cream, what do we need to remember when struggling in the moment with a specific crave?

 

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Stop and ask yourself, “What am I really needing?”  Tap the point in the middle of your forehead and use the Tadd Technique, which is moving your focus from the solar plexus gut area to the third eye in the middle of your forehead. From this more objective perspective look to see if the crave is a good choice and if not ask, “What is my priority in this moment?” From the third eye we are guided in the direction of healthy and appropriate desires rather then craves and addictions that sabotage our potential and that stem from imbalance.

 

Ellen Tadd is a Boston-based clairvoyant counselor and past life therapist.  You can read her article  “Cravings Are an Emotional Message” on her website here or learn more about her, her teachings, services, events and work at www.ellentadd.com.  

Or More

14 Sep

It’s remarkable when we get exactly what we want.

I can remember about four years ago, I had a short play that I was absolutely in love with.  It was about two older women who had retired to Siberia to escape terrorist attacks, only to be bombarded with oncoming asteroids.  It was funny, touching (if I do say so myself) and eerily relevant given the times in which we live.  I kept telling friends and collaborators that what I wanted more than anything was to get “a New York production of the play and then publish it in a commercial anthology of other short plays.”  I was obsessive about this, relentless about this.  I knew exactly what I wanted for this project and spoke of it often.  And lo and behold, I got it.  About a year or so later, the play received a NYC production with a two-week run in a larger festival and then was published in a short play anthology through Vintage Press.

I asked for it and I got it.  No more, no less.

But I think there is the possibility of more.  I think, had I told everyone I wanted a New York production and it to be published “or something better/something more” I might have actually gotten more.

We think we know what’s best for us.  And if we’re really listening to our intuition, a lot of that is really valid; but I also think we’re not aware to the infinite possibilities that exist for us – that perhaps, what we think we may want, is only a small fraction of what is really possible.

The idea of “more” and abundance is seen in most religions.  Samantha Faye, on her radio show “Psychic Teachers,” often quotes from the Bible where Jesus (and I’m paraphrasing here) says to his disciples: “There is so much more to teach you, but I can’t because you wouldn’t understand,” implying the mind-blowing array of metaphysical knowledge and wisdom he could have shared but knew it wouldn’t be received at that time.  When making New Year’s Resolutions and lists of goals, it’s often said to end your list with the simple phrase: This, or something better.  Often times, too, when I hear people talk about their romantic partners, they will say, “And then so and so came along, who was ten times better than anyone I could have ever imagined.”  If we listen closely, the idea of there being “more” available and dispersed among us is everywhere.

Expectations can be succeeded; possibilities can be immense; abundance can multiply tenfold.

With this recent realization in my mind, I have taken to applying it to my nightly routine.  Before bedtime, I take time to look at my very crowded and ambitious vision board, focusing on one thing in particular that I want to manifest.   I see it clearly before me, through “feelingizations” attain it and try it on, and then hold it in front of me, as if it were gift wrapped and ready to open.  Softly, almost in a whisper, I look at it head-on and proclaim, with hope: “This, or something better; this, too, and more.”

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